My Head Hurts…

Hi All,

Just when I thought I had it all sorted with my writing and what direction it actually was that I wanted to go, then I start doubting it again. I love writing and it would be a dream to make a career out of it. And I thought that the NCTJ Journalism course I was booked onto in September was what I wanted, but I am having a few doubts. I love creative writing, I enjoy fiction and I adore creating plots and stories. Journalism, obviously, is a lot more real…and I am not 100% convinced that it is what I want to focus on.

When I enquired about the course at Wolverhampton College, I was in a job that I disliked and I felt like I was eager to find anything to get me away from it. Now, I am looking at that course deeper and wondering at how interested I would be in it. Yes, its 12 months and its a qualification that I can get onto the CV. It would be ideal for showing how passionate I am about writing, but I am worried about studying a course where my heart isn’t into it. The thing is with me is that there is more than one thing that I could imagine doing with my life. Each career choice is circling around my head, and I am struggling to decide what I actually want to do.

Photography is still a passion of mine, and I can foresee myself picking it up again, although wedding photography is no longer a service that I want to provide (apart from the odd job that I still have booked in)

Writing is still a big passion of mine and that will never change, but do I want to go into reporting the news? Do I want to have a structure and style based on where I write for? Do I want to study a course and learn all of the differing laws and guidelines that Journalisms adhere to?

When it comes to writing I can see myself writing fiction, I can see myself writing screenplays and helping to produce dramas. I can see myself working for businesses to help write up information about what they are selling. And I can see myself working for myself from home.

I have also toyed with the idea of having a complete career switch and studying for a career that is more people orientated. I envy people who work within the NHS and I can see myself as a midwife. I have thought and thought about this over the past 18 months and it is still something that I feel like I would like to do at some point in my life. One thing that puts me off more than anything is how much time I would be away from the boys, which is something that I would like to look more into in a few years when the boys are a bit older.

Aswell as this, I also like the thought of training to be a early years teaching assistant. I love little people and I would love to work in a school, not forgetting that this career choice would guarantee all of the school holidays off with the boys.

So, I have a lot to think about. I feel like I am going through it in my mind every single second of the day….I know it seems like I’m flipping from one thing to the next and I contradict myself left, right and centre, but this is an important decision…I don’t want to waste anymore time than I have to.

One good thing that currently work is not a factor that is affecting any decisions. I can literally do whatever I want….and it is a great feeling. I just need to decide what it is that I want to do!

I am sure that by the next time I write on here, then I will have made my mind up.


We can but hope, eh? 😀

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