Torturing myself

I spent a good portion of my night thinking about the people in my life. I lost out on sleep and managed to get a mere 4 hours before I had to take boys to school.

Like many people, I have those that support me and those that don’t. I went through scenarios and battles that I should have either avoided or done more about. I have people who would go that extra mile for me, and who I would do the same…..and then I have others who can’t be bothered. People who put their own needs and feelings before others.

And I ask myself….why do I torture myself about it all?

Why do I constantly fret over who likes me and who doesn’t? Why do I put myself out there, just to feel rejection and hurt? I have been through some shitty stuff over the past few years, more than anyone should deal with in any one lifetime….and it has made me realise who I can count on 100% and who lets me down time and time again. I should turn away and not let them get to me, but it’s hard! I am going to start looking after me and mine. I will give the same amount of support to those who give it to me…..match support with support. And then see how long it takes before I hear any complaints….

I have a busy year ahead of me, and I want to focus on moving towards a brighter, future and career. I need to learn to shake the negative people off!

2 thoughts on “Torturing myself

Add yours

  1. For some of us, I think it’s easier to care greatly and for others, it’s easier to care greatly about themselves. For us who care a lot about others, we have to make sure we are putting that same effort in our own lives, which can be easy to forget.

    I wish you luck in your future endeavors and live like no one is watching 🙂.

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

WordPress.com.

Up ↑

Dear Brown Skin Girl

Self Experiences, Self Expression, Life Quotes, Poetry, Motivation, Encouragement, Spirituality,Spoken Word, Soul, Brown Skin Girl

Taking Back Love

Author. Entrepreneur. Dreamer.

Space Time Bae

Throwing my soul into the cosmos.

Written By Glenn Thomas

Follow the Forever Changing and Never Ending Writing Journey

Wokeread

Books any time any day.

FindingMe♥

My journey with bipolar depression, PTSD, anxiety & paranoia

Inner Peace

True wealth is the wealth of the soul

Rebel for the hell of it

Write to express

Nico’s Domain - Ignorance Is Bliss

Day-dreamer and servant of God

Un_maestro

A deviant among Sheep providing knowledge to stimulate the mind and poetry to stimulate the soul

tinytotspoetry

I AIM TO PLEASE THE YOUNG AND YOUNG AT HEART WITH POEMS DESIGNED FOR KIDS. READ ALONG WITH YOUR SMALL TOTS FOR FUN.. LET'S MAKE RHYMING FUN AND EXCITING!!!

TheGeminiJournalist

Jamaican Author

A Story About Waffles

Words, followed by more words.

My Paper Lungs

A girl not afraid to take life slowly.

Miscellany Pages

Book Blog with Variety - Expand Your Reading Horizons

A cup of coffee

Thank you for visiting my page! I am Earl and this page is a world of confessions from nobody which aims to share spectrum of feelings and inspiration that are reflected in the works of letters.

Laura's Books and Blogs

Writing tips, giveaways, reviews, essays, and more!

Nin Chronicles

Writers Are Parents

%d bloggers like this: